What do you do when you are no longer attracted to your spouse?

I am not married nor even engaged, but I have a relationship with the same severity of marriage.





I do not believe in cheating and I have a spouse who wants to work on our relationship, but he hurt me so bad that my guard is up and I don't feel connected or attracted to him at all.





What would you suggest in this case?





Thank you!





If you have nothing nice to say, please don't say anything at all =)What do you do when you are no longer attracted to your spouse?
This is really hard. I think I understand what you are saying. You weren't' specific about how he hurt you. My ex cheated on me. Before that I was extremely attracted to him %26amp; completely in love with him. I don't know if it was just because I grew up %26amp; became more mature or if it was because of how badly he had hurt me, but I no longer felt the same way for him. I can remember when I just wanted to be with him %26amp; all over him. But after he cheated I could never look at him the same way. I also think the fact that I was very young %26amp; immature when I met him that changed. I think you need to evaluate your situation. I don't know what he did to hurt you, but decide if it was something that is completely unforgivable or just something minor that you can get over. Also, when my ex %26amp; I did break up %26amp; I found out he was dating someone new, all of a sudden I wanted him back. It wasn't because I really wanted to be with him, it was just my pride. I didn't want him to be with anyone else. You should consider that also, will you be okay if he moves on to a new relationship. Good luck.What do you do when you are no longer attracted to your spouse?
I think you are in a unique situation that you can easily leave him. Perhaps things are complicated because you have a child together, or you own a house together, etc., but the good news is that you are not married to him and you have a right to leave. If he hurt you recently, imagine the possibility that you might get over that in time. I once read that successful relationships involve people being committed to the relationship, not necessarily to each other. That means that even though sometimes our partners upset us, if you are committed to making the situation work out and you are not being harmed physically or emotionally, then you work on the relationship and don't give up on it. Also, since you are not married, don't rule out the possibility of a break to be without him and see if you miss him and take time to sort through your feelings. Best of luck!
If you mean you're living with someone, no it's not the same as marriage... the same level of commitment is just never there. I lived with someone for a long time before I met my husband and, believe me, the committment is just nowhere near the same.





If he cheated on you, you either have to decide if you want to get past it and forgive him and forget it and move past it and IF you are able to do all that or if you want to walk away. Those are kind of the options that you have from what I see if I got the story straight from the info you gave. Good luck to you.
I can assure you that it won't get any better. I am married and my spouse hurt me really bad too. Cheated on me several times and has even been physically abusive to me. He still lies to me to this day. However, we have a little girl and I am that person who always said i'd never stay just for kids, but it's totally different when you're in the situation and have a little girl asking for Daddy. I recommend that you leave...don't stay with him if you don't look at him like your would on your first date. Don't get me wrong, the honeymoon phase always passes, but you still need to feel something. Trust me, you'll be miserable if you don't...I am...
';Severity of marriage';, ';he hurt you so bad that my guard is up and I don't feel connected or attracted to him at all?';





What exactly do you want to hear from me? You are contradicting yourself way too much. It is impossible for me to give you a straight answer. Marriage is not the ';Pearly Gates'; and if you mention ';severity';, than it sounds like some sort of ';abuse';.





Edit: You don't live together, you don't have kids, you are not attracted to him, move on ! Why waste years of your life?
I think by making yourself feel sexy you want to be with your partner, women tend to want to have sex cause they feel attractive and need to feel desired, men just want to have sex.


If he's cheated you may feel he doesnt find you attractive and this would make you not want to sleep with him
if your not interested in your mate anymore why do you stay . if you had kids i could see why.its always hard to go out on your own and start new but god willing you can do it explore new things try new things go on with your life.*** MILDRED IS MY FRIEND***
Well, if you aren't married, then what are you doing with this guy, anyway?





And no, its not the same severity as marriage- nothing is quite the same.....
depends on what he did that hurt you. You have to deal with that before you can move forward. The attraction will come when the hurt heals
If you are not married, nor even engaged, then he isn't your spouse. I would just end the relationship. It's pretty simple. Nothing gained, nothing lost.
your not married,,there's no point in staying and being tortured,,i'd leave,,and go find someone who's more compatible
take a break from him to sort out how you really feel. Give it a few weeks. Your heart will tell you from there.
Think about whether or not you still want to be with him. It sounds like you're miserable.
Leave, move on, and in time you will find someone worthwhile.


If there is no spark there is no sex, if there is no sex than you might as well just split up and move on......!
A relationship the way you describe isn't worth staying in. I'd pack my things and be on my way.